Thinking Fast and Slow, a book about the dual system in our brain that informs human thinking, received a great review from the WSJ. Check out this article to learn about Daniel Kahneman and Amos Tversky’s fascinating work.
Spotted by Daniel Lubetzky, by Adeena Schlussel
This clip from Sesame Street brings back childhood memories.
Emily Rapp spoke to me as a Dad and as a human being like few have ever done. I strongly recommend this life-affirming article from this courageous and beautiful mother.
A few years ago some ‘happiness’ researchers contended that parents were actually less happy than couples without children because of the sorrows and headaches accompanied by raising children. I remember thinking that is the most ridiculous and superficial analysis I’ve ever read. Of course there are challenges. But they underline the exponential rewards.
Now comes a new analysis about what truly constitutes happiness in a well-rounded way. It debunks the equation of temporary moods or even positive attitudes with ‘happiness." These are of course interrelated, but so is meaning, a sense of accomplishment, engagement, etc.
The attached article shares some of the new thinking on measuring happiness. Some of these insights reminded me of the theme of the commencement speech I gave at Trinity University a couple weeks ago.
It is an interesting question posed by Wall Street Journal’s Matt Ridley: what genes contribute to aggressive and violent behavior, and how could one hypothetically find the answers by looking at Osama’s brain? In this article, Ridley consults with psychologist Prof. Baron-Cohen who lists the various genes that may aggregate to produce either violent or empathetic behavior. If morality is predetermined by our genes, there are severe moral implications attached.
Spotted by Daniel Lubetzky, redacted by Adeena Schlussel
In a recent New York Times Article, David Brooks discusses two opposing sides of the evolutionary debate: does selfish, survival of the fittest tactics propel individuals towards success as commonly perceived? Or, on the other hand, do morality, kindness and cooperation play a role in reaching the top? Brooks explores work of various professors, concluding that no matter who is right, if cooperation and morality are innate to our behavior, ethics and emotion are inseparable from understanding our daily lives.
Spotted by Daniel Lubetzky, redacted by Adeena Schlussel
Susan Colin Marks is one of those rare human beings whose presence in ANY context invariably enriches the experience of ALL involved. Stunned at seeing how she always managed to have a positive attitude, even vis a vis people that others would find unpalatable to interact with, I asked her how she handled situations where an ordinary mortal would consider a counterpart to be annoying, self-righteous, or even unjust and inhumane. She shared that her secret is to build a reservoir of compassion, and that whenever I found myself judging others for being too self-centered, or unjust to others, I would need to reach into that reservoir and try to understand that they may be behaving that way out of insecurity, or other limitations in the human spirit that probably made them who they are, and reduced their happiness. I should feel for them. At the beginning I semi-dismissed this as New Age California talk. But I tried it when I felt negative reactions towards others and it worked marvels.
Now, living life the way Susan does is not easy. It will take a ton of work to get even remotely close, and to even hope this mindset becomes instinctual. But to the extent you can incorporate this thinking tool into your internal kit, it definitely can make you happier and more effective.
I do still wonder if injustice should always merit compassion. Is an outright lie or evil behavior worthy of it? Should your compassion help you reach out to those people? Or should you channel that indignation to energize your work and fight that injustice? Since I was a kid, and living in the shadow and the memories of the Holocaust that my Dad went through, I find that when I notice someone be unfair to another, it inspires my action to help. But also I have found that it repeatedly angers me and saddens me, sometimes to the point of being emotionally draining beyond belief. Do you accept those feelings and welcome them as a sign of your moral compass? Or are they a reflection of imperfection and judgmentality?
My assumption is that, sadly, there are at least some people who are so devoid of a human soul that they may not merit “compassion” as it will delude us into thinking that they can be negotiated with and they can be very dangerous to the world. People like Hitler or Ahmadinejad. They need to be contained, confronted, and opposed with all moral fiber and all necessary efforts. I don’t personally subscribe to pacifism because my Dad would not have been alive if the Nazis had not been fought. Sadly, the use of force in some cases is tragically unavoidable.
But those people are probably an exceptional rarity. Most human beings will go their entire lives without crossing paths with people that truly do not merit compassion. In the overwhelming majority of cases, compassion towards people you don’t like or appreciate can probably make you a more effective leader, and a happier and more positive person.
And I assume Susan would probably find compassion for all, even for those I dismiss as beyond the pale. What is your answer?
This quote was shared by Debbie Roos at the Trinity University 20th year reunion:
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away – Hilary Cooper
You must not lose faith in humanity. Humanity is an ocean; if a few drops of the ocean are dirty, the ocean does not become dirty.
Mohandas Gandhi
